Wednesday, November 14, 2007

i tried. no, seriously. i did.

in the spirit of being economical, my friend and i decided to have a "cheap night". it was wonderful...and then it backfired.

and so, i present, you know you are in no shape to take the train home by yourself when:

a. you are entirely too preoccupied with the rats running around the subway. (note: your ipod may be broken, your cell phone out-of-service at the station, and the book you're reading contains print entirely too small to see after ___ glasses of wine - so really, you have no other choice. right.)

b. you put on your glasses, so you can more closely see the subway rats.

c. when a rat climbs up a on a rail (aside: what's up with the 3rd rail? how is it electrified and "dangerous" when birds and rodents alight on it constantly?) and gets a little higher than the rest of the rats, you actually hope, no really, you hope, that he hops on the platform and runs near you so you can pet him. (note: this may perhaps signify that you are still, 7 months later, not over the death of your first pet cat, tigger, and need a furry little presence in your life. pronto.)

d. upon waiting 25 minutes and having to let two R trains pass you by - and cursing yourself that you used to live off the R train, but now insisted on moving closer to astoria's other train, the "more convenient N" - you finally step on to an N train, and you discover its heading downtown. in the complete opposite direction of your home.

and so, you find yourself climbing the subway stairs to the street to hail a cab, 40 minutes later and 1 stop further into manhattan than you started, and you realize why you spend a good 30% of your salary taking taxis home. its simply so that you make it to your 28th birthday.


Chuckles said...

The third rail won't kill them if they don't ground it. That is why birds can alight on power lines. Well, that and insulation.

P H said...

which is why you should always carry a gun on the subway. to shoot rats.

missyandchrissy said...

thanks chuckles. i'm probably just neurotic about the 3rd rail due to my dad's tall tales about it to keep us off the tracks.

ph, i didn't want to shoot the rats. i wanted to pet them!

you go hunting one time...

Chuckles said...

I thought New York had overhead power lines in the subway.

Chuckles said...

Also, missy take chrissy and bear to go see or rent Mulberry Street. It explains the angers of rats in the New York subway system in a way that I can't do in type.