Tuesday, February 27, 2007

i'll take allergy meds for $200.

almost every night that missy and i dine together at home we wind up watching wheel of fortune, since we're usually just sitting down at about 7:30. but we've actually been 'wheel watchers' from a very early age, since our grandmother loved the show and it was always on whenever we were over her apartment.

besides bringing back fond memories of our childhood, wheel also serves as a great confidence booster since we're excellent at the game. we know - its not hard. but it makes us feel smart nonetheless, especially when we solve the bonus round puzzles.

on the evenings when we manage to get dinner on the table a little bit earlier, we tune in to jeopardy, but unfortunately there usually aren't many bonus round victories for us then. until last night, when i discovered a category i'm an absolute master at -- "at the drugstore".

it was a clean sweep -- i actually might have broken the record in speed answering. i knew all my trips to duane reade would pay off at some point.

Thursday, February 22, 2007

best. thing. ever.

we haven't done this feature in awhile...we're sure you missed it.

but notice the additional punctuation in the headline this time around - all for emphasis. we may say this a lot, but tonight we really were, really, privy to the BEST thing ever.

it was a little show called "Point Break Live!". yes, like the cinematic masterpiece. as if the movie itself wasn't enough poorly-acted, busey-filled, homoerotic fun, now there is a live-action version, featuring surfing, skydiving, meatball heroes, and ponchos for the audience members. oh, and the lead of johnny utah was played by a random audience member reading off of cue cards, ensuring the proper keanu-style delivery of the dialogue.

seriously, we haven't laughed this hard in weeks. if you're in the area, definitely check this one out.

Monday, February 19, 2007

weekend entertainment.

i'll start by apologizing for the irratic font thing we have going on - i like everything looking uniform, but lately i don't know if i'm tired of using trebuchet, or tired of the general look of our little site, or just getting old and blind and finding it harder to read what we've been posting, so i'm trying to change some things up. bear with us until we find our groove.

so a few snippets from this blissfully long and incredibly enjoyable weekend,

i knew i was being a bit of an ass on saturday when leaving the house in a pair of ballet flats, but i had a lot of roaming around to do that afternoon and evening and my feet have bored of being booted up all the time, so slush be damned, i trotted off in them. while on my way to the met (their 'glitter and doom' exhibition was awesome) i managed to find an even bigger asshole - the guy attempting to navigate his way around the snow piles on his segway. it took him about 5 minutes to find a way off the curb, as he circled around our fellow pedestrians and the mounds of snow piled up on the corners. i think segways are naturally hilarious, so spotting one in such a ridiculous situation had me in stitches for the rest of the afternoon.


did you know that pharell's clothing line makes a hoodie with an all-over print of beepers and cigarette butts? i didn't either until this 12 year old (ok, he was 21 but looked 12, as missy and i learned when he approached us smirking and stating "i couldn't help but notice you lookin' at me" and missy informed him "yes, we were trying to figure out exactly how old you are. our guess is 19.") at a bar the other night was rockin one. we tried to steal it, to no avail, as it was definitely the most ghetto fabulous article of clothing we had seen in some time.

i was addressed last night by a random stranger with "hey rockstar", which is definitely the most creative greeting i've gotten in awhile. and really if you're a male trying to get my attention in a bar, calling me a rockstar gives you a vastly better chance over those sheep using 'hey baby' and 'you're hot'.


alternatively, what should you not say to a random stranger? while up at the bar getting us drinks my friend found this guy celebrating his bday and as we were out for a birthday as well, invited him over to our table. i somehow wound up being the one left to entertain him, which i suppose was fitting since it turns out he was in fact a 'rockstar' himself, a man in a band, wearing more eyeliner than i was and toting his drumsticks around. in the midst of chatting i noticed he had pulled out a pair of gloves and was putting them on. i could tell they were gloves for drumming, but as he wasn't going onstage and the only thing in his hand was a miller lite i thought this to be a little bizarre, and thinking it was amusing, inquired if he planned on murdering someone at the table. he gave me a short little 'no' accompanied by a scowl - not at all the reaction i was expecting considering i was laughing hysterically at this inside my head - and conversation died down shortly after. oh well. lesson learned - perhaps men in eye makeup don't take jokes as well as others.

Wednesday, February 14, 2007

winds are blowing southwest at 30 mph, right past the closet doors.

loveandcyanide learned an extremely important lesson about air conditioners this morning: you should cover them for the winter.

not like our wise father hasn't told us this numerous times, but of course we've ignored his warnings. didn't the man know what an eyesore all that insulation would make on our lovely bedroom walls? while we were well aware of some air blowing in from time to time, we like having our bedrooms a little on the chilly side (Bear being of the polar variety and all) so it was never too big a deal.

i awoke this morning at 5:22am to the sound of the wind. i also felt my room, although usually kept at a cool temperature to ensure a comfortable sleep in a cocoon of down comforter - even in august - was excessively chilly. and i swore that in my slight line of vision from within my pillows and blanket that i saw little particles floating around near my alarm clock. but needing more than five hours sleep, i chalked it up to a hallucination caused by last night's vino and went back to bed.

two hours later missy appeared in my room and as we stood underneath our respective air conditioners, being pelted with wind and precipitation, we realized it had indeed been sleeting into our apartment all night.

and so we spent the rest of the morning cleaning up the aftermath of our very special visit from "nor'easter 07".

Friday, February 09, 2007

bird, watching.

so i was sitting here being a busy little worker bee just before, and suddenly had the feeling that someone was staring at me. i glanced at my door, and no one was standing there. so i looked the other way out the window, and saw two pigeons sitting on the rail of the balcony that runs outside my window. the little beasts were just sitting there, staring in.

feeling slightly flustered and on display, i went back to what i was doing. a minute later i looked up, and they were still there, glaring at me with their beady little pigeon eyes. really, how did they know that i inadvertently consumed* one of their kind recently?

this went on for a good 5 minutes until the birds flew away, presumably to go peep in on a fellow coworker.

*if your dining companion tells you that a squab is merely a "small bird", and it tastes really good, you eat first, ask questions like "do you mean 'small bird' as in 'domesticated pigeon'?" later.

Wednesday, February 07, 2007

nothing says love like a chicken ring.


this is awesome. i have no idea if this is old news. or if this promotion has been a yearly thing, but it clearly wasn't around when i was in college or else i would have certainly been taken to the whitey's across the street from our campus for such a spectacle.

view from the top.

i wore heels today for the first time in about two months, so i got to experience life from a few inches up. it also reminded me of an enlightening conversation a friend and i had recently, about childhood height vs. adult height.

there's no nice way to put it - it sucks to be a tall girl growing up. beyond the standard reasons - you're always in the back of the line, and then there are never enough boys to make it to the back of the line, so you're stuck being line partners - and worse, horror,
dance partners! - with another girl. you will inevitably have a boyfriend who is shorter than you, prompting you forever more to only fall for guys under 5'11 (or is that just me?) it will be difficult to buy clothing. and you will be mercilessly teased with height related nicknames like 'the 6ft wiener'. oh the lengths the boys went to find something that rhymed with my first name...

but worse than any of that, what my friend and i concluded, are the expectations. we have literally fallen short of what everyone expected from us.

i suppose that when coming into contact with a 5'2 fifth grader all most adults can do is comment and coo over the fact that the girl is going to grow up to be a supermodel. or basketball player. or something equally as exotic. making the child believe,
yes! who cares that i suffer at the end of the line behind you short fools. i will someday be making millions on the catwalk. but when you hit your top height midway through high school, and its a mere six inches taller than you were at the age of 10, and its not anything that extraordinary, suddenly you realize all that anticipation was over nothing. sure, you're above average, but you're not going to be rewarded with a WNBA contract anytime soon.

Monday, February 05, 2007

a super day in the sty.

figures that we turn one and get all excited on our big birthday and then blogger goes on the fritz for a few days so we can't post nor leave comments thanking everyone for the bday wishes, making us seem like those classmates who only invited you to their sweet sixteen to make it look like they had more friends and to get more money and then suddenly no longer knew your name in the locker room after the hoopla of their day died down. what the hell.

so yesterday was our first annual PIGFEST.
the roots of pigfest started last week when fresh direct sent us an email announcing that with every purchase of $75 or more you would receive a free superbowl platter consisting of: pigs in a blanket, knishes, and coney island pigs in a blanket (which are apparently pib's with relish and sauerkraut tucked inside the blanket as well. who knew.)

never ones to pass by a deal, more specifically a deal that involves hotdogs, we put together our $75+ shopping cart in record time and had our very special delivery sitting on our kitchen table by saturday afternoon.

24 hours later as we were heating up the contents of our platter, opening beers and wine, ordering appropriate platter-accompanying snacks from the diner and debating whether or not vanilla milkshakes should be consumed before or after onion rings, missy deemed our disgustingly wonderful gorge-a-thon "pigfest" and we decided to make it our newest superbowl sunday tradition. not like we watched the game - unless the "puppy bowl" counts - but who needs pigskin when you have PIGFEST?