week, end. please.

i've mentioned the receptionist in my office before - a sweet lady, but slightly incompetent/something's a little off.

and if you'll recall from my 'award-winning cough' era in late 2006 (boy that statement makes loveandcyanide feel old!), she's always taken an interest in my health and well-being.

**

so yesterday i had to leave early for a doctor's appt as i was still languishing in illnessville from earlier in the week (diagnosis: sinus infection. thank goodness for antibiotics and their ability to make the bass that was pounding in my face stop). in my office, people tend to send around a company-wide "hey, i'm leaving early" or "hey, i'm out sick/coming in late/etc" email, which i sort of hate doing because it makes me feel like i'm soliciting "feel better!" emails when i'm just making a statement about where i'm off to, and i honestly don't care for everyone to know about my business and whereabouts to begin with, but i suppose it makes life easier in terms of knowing that someone isn't at their desk in the case that you need them (of course this doesn't prevent some idiot, usually the same idiot, leaving a voicemail saying "hey, where are you??").

**

so i send my little "i'm off to the doctor - see ya tomorrow" email and off i go. when i finally get back to my apartment last night and check through the emails i missed, as predicted, i have a few nice "feel better!" responses. topping them all, topping any email i received in the past month, is the response from my receptionist. i reprint it here in full, because my summarizing it won't do it justice:


I lucked out at not getting sick this year: Here is my unsolicited, non professional medical advice:

I eat beans and brown rice -no pork- about 3 days out of the week
I eat pea soup - home made- 2 days out of the week
I eat grapefruits and/or oranges 5-6 days out of the week during the winter (a new strategy that's working! makes me think of Florida and California when I eat them!)

I eat a lot of baked potatoes - i have no idea what that does - probably keeps me away from the ice cream.

I take a multi vitamin, iron and calcium and hair, skin and nail vitamins. Ask your real doctor about these. Heath Ledger and all, ask the real doctor before taking any of these!

I take 2 10 minute walks 5 days a week. I weight train twice a week for half an hour. I squeeze in an aerobic video tape when I think of it.

There are a lot of foods that tempt me! Some days I give in. Some days I don't. On those days I try to do an aerobic video tape or take a longer walk.