career day.

i got weaseled into participating in 'career day' at my mother's school today. while honored that my mother thinks that i actually have a career, i was rather nervous (read: had nightmares all wednesday night) about how i'd be able to pull off a speech about publicity that would appeal to a bunch of unruly inner-city 5th graders.

well i worried for absolutely nothing, since i forgot how much cachet being a teacher's child carries. from the moment i was introduced as mrs. x's daughter, i became a minor celebrity. kids shouted out what year she taught them, debated whether or not i resembled her, and begged me to reveal her age.

when i actually did get to speak about my career, i managed to engage at least two of three classes i spoke to (in the first one the kids seemed completely stoned, and oblivious to the fact i was even there. i pity their teacher.), and the kids had a ton of questions for me. some of the best:

• are you married?
• do you ever think about quitting your job?
• on your day off, do you just sit around your house? that's what my mom does on her day off.
• would you ever want to promote video games?
• can you order breakfast and eat it at your desk?
• can you leave your office for lunch?
• if you bring your lunch, how does it get warm? do you have an oven there?
• if there is another girl in the office with the same job as you, are you jealous of her?
• how much money do you make?

and my personal favorites:

are there signs in your office that say no running in the halls, no yelling, and no smoking?

and

is there anyone in your office who is really weird and no one likes them?

as you can tell, they were mostly preoccupied with my workplace eating habits. it was all sort of adorable, but i was quite happy to be able to come back to my peaceful office. maybe being an aunt is really all that i'm cut out for.