we miss the good old days.

i've always felt this "metrosexual" thing was a little much. all of a sudden the guys i dated used more hair products than i did. they swapped their big jeans for really tight ones. they cared more about matching their shoes to their jacket than i did.

but i was ok with it. i thought it was cute how much they cared about their appearance. that they didn't want to be grunting neanderthals in my presence. they wanted me to be pretty and groomed, and wanted to be pretty and groomed for me in return. reciprocity! it's a beautiful thing. i'm all about it.

but now its gone a bit too far. its ok for some guys - the executives in their neat little offices in their neat little pinstripe suits - to get a little prissy. but suddenly that last bastion of manliness - the construction worker - has turned a bit soft on us.

first it was sissy. she was walking eastbound on the upper east side and went under a patch of scaffolding. as she walked through she passed a pair of construction workers, and one of them said, "heyy, nice eyebrows." she couldn't ignore them like she usually does - because this exclamation was just too unique and ridiculous - so she started laughing. which must have encouraged them, as they then followed up with, "do you pluck or wax?"

a block away, after pondering the absolute insanity of that exchange, she realized that she should have retorted with "i thread" and have thrown them off completely.

then, earlier this week, it was me. i was trotting along in a flouncy skirt and my new ankle-strap zebra striped ballet flats. as i walked by a con-ed truck, i felt one of the workers following me with his eyes. as i passed by the end of the truck, he shouted, "cute shoes!" cute shoes??? what about "nice legs"? a wolf whistle? i coveted those shoes - my best friends, i expected, would covet (and compliment) those shoes as well - but a random man on the street? why wasn't he coveting my legs, not my shoes? shouldn't he have been checking out my body?

no way. boys, this is a bit too much. we're confused. please. we implore you -- go back to your vulgar, womanizing ways.