Wednesday, June 07, 2006

you know you were in useless knowledge withdrawal.

We're baaa-aack...

and quite happy to report that your favorite three amigas were neither arrested, deported, nor attacked by monkeys during their exciting little overseas adventure. We have some stories for you all, but will save them for another time, as our hands are lazy from spending so much time laying idly at our sides whilst we tanned all week.

But since you kids have so patiently awaited our return, we can't go to bed leaving you empty handed. errr, minded. (vacations make us so benevolent). so here is some v. important information on how to tell the difference between cozies and hardboiled mystery novels, courtesy of www.crimespreemag.com. when you find yourself at an agatha christie convention and are quizzed on this stuff, remember to thank loveandcyanide.

If the book has an elderly character that solves crimes in her spare time, it is a cozy.
If the book has an elderly character that gets shot seven times in the face and is then raped, it is hardboiled.

If a cat, dog, or other cute domestic animal helps solve the crime, it is a cozy.
If a cat, dog, or other cute domestic animal is set on fire, it is hardboiled.

If the murder weapon is a fast-acting poison, it is a cozy.

If the murder weapon is a blowtorch, it is hardboiled.


3 comments:

Chuckles said...

if the murder is motivated by art/antiques, it is a cozy.

if the murder is motivated by drugs/corporate greed, it is hardboiled.

Chuckles said...

if tea is involved in the story, it is a cozy.

if gin is involved in the story, it is hardboiled.

Everyone knows gin makes a man mean.

missyandchrissy said...

sometimes tea makes us mean. we don't know why.