ring ring, whoreface.

the title has nothing to do with the rest of this posting, but missy just addressed me with it, and it was too good not to document somewhere. now on to more important matters.

one of the best things about leaving the country is the diversity that you find beyond our borders. now i'm not talking about people or vegetation - you can watch the discovery channel for a discourse on that. i'm referring to the massive selection of Nestle ice cream products that are found in other parts of the world.

when you think of nestle ice cream products - well, if you think of them. but really, why wouldn't you?? - i'm assuming you envision your supermarket's freezer dept and the blue boxes of drumsticks and crunch pops. pretty standard. pretty dull. those new tollhouse cookie ice cream sandwiches are rather good, but not enough to compensate for the lack of excitement in the rest of the line. however, step foot off US soil and suddenly nestle is the creme de la creme (how does one use accent marks on this thing?) of the ice cream world. from the exotic variety of flavors to the fun characters on their signs to the ridiculously snazzy and adorable toy containers some of the ice creams are held in, it's apparent that nestle is king.

while having a most serious and intellectual conversation over the abundance of nestle products in the foreign ice cream market, we came to the conclusion that it's due to their lack of ice cream chains. europe (or at least the decent amount of countries we've been to within europe) is devoid of the carvels and dairy queens that plague our streets and shopping malls, beckoning to us fat americans with promises of 400 flavors, copious amounts of candy toppings and giant sized portions. poor little nestle is squeezed out of the ice cream game. totally unfair. i'd take plain vanilla ice cream in a plastic astronaut monkey over the singing freaks at coldstone or baskin and his 31 flavors any old day.

now some of you may be sitting there saying "what can be so damn special about these products?" and "why am i bothering to read this long essay on ice cream?" well, here is some photographic evidence to persuade you/make all this reading worthwhile (everyone loves pictures).

exhibit A:




who wouldn't want to buy an ice pop from one of those adorable little cows?

exhibit B:

this is friky fresa. he is a little plastic dinosaur/mouse/monster that comes filled with strawberry ice cream. what fun!


exhibit C:


Vachy contains vanilla and chocolate ice cream. because missy is a withholder, she opted to not inform me of vachy's existence after checking out the contents of a freezer, even though she knows the cow is one of my favorite animals. typical. however, she did buy me...

exhibit D:

PUNKY!! (pronounce poon-ky by the man selling the ice cream) he actually said "you likey punky? me likey punky too". and i'm sure he knows his stuff.

so punky may have been filled with plain old vanilla ice cream, but his awesome yellow plastic eyebrows, rubber red spiky hair and odd little hole in his mouth (which i take as his ability to become a sippy-cup for alcohol, now that he's been depleted of his duty as an ice cream container) more than made him one of the best ice cream experiences of my life. me likey punky indeed. bear likes punky too. (a little too much, one might say)