we know what we know.

on sunday missy and i went to see the final performance of Paul Simon's month-long residency at BAM (the brooklyn academy of music. i am aware that is was obnoxious of me to use an acronym that everyone may not know, but really its just so much fun to say BAM). BAM!

it was a good show, but during it we were reminded of something that has been bothering us for awhile now - the regularity of the standing ovation. have you all noticed this as well? basically any theater performance i've been to in recent years culminates with a standing ovation (with the exception of "Die Hard The Puppet Musical", which is possibly the only show i've seen lately that i really wanted to give one to) and i don't ever remember this being the case when i was younger. i always thought they should be reserved for special occasions - and the all-knowing wikipedia agrees with me - but now people just leap to their feat during every performance and it annoys the hell out of loveandcyanide. sure its a little easier to clap while upright and we have to get up to exit the theater anyways, but aren't we losing the significance of the standing ovation in the process?

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now i don't mean to stereotype all of them out there, and no offense to any of our readers if you happen to be one* but josh groban fans are psychotic. no really. they are rabid, overly emotional crazy women. i daresay they are solely responsible for the bad rap the rest of us women sometimes get.

so we had the misfortune of being seated in the midst of a whole pack of them, something we didn't initially realize - josh groban fans look like the rest of us; perhaps one might consider them a bit dowdier - but became slightly suspect of once i heard the woman in front of me say to her friend "i'm SO happy we're on this side of the stage opposite the piano so i have a better view of joshy." right.

then halfway through the show it was his turn to perform, and the minute joshy appeared at the side of the stage there were screams. and shrieks. and sobs. and moans of ecstasy. really?? over a skinny guy with curly hair and an operatic voice? but i digress. so the grobanites** went absolutely bonkers, especially during his final song of the three he performed, which was 'bridge over troubled water' which is generally a depressing song, but when you have this deep baritone booming it throughout a room becomes even more melancholy. or maybe i was just depressed watching the middle-aged crazy ladies around me and seeing one possible path of my future.

in any event, joshy's part of the performance ended (to a minor standing ovation, of course) and then came loveandcyanide's favorite part of the show as the woman sitting behind us -- after her friend had to advise her a few times to "breathe" - regained her composure, sighed and exclaimed "that is the future father of my children".

in the future we will be avoiding the grobanites.


*but really, don't tell us if you are.

**this sounds like something i made up, but after finishing the post i checked it out, and indeed, they are grobanites. and they have many websites.

special report from your waffle correspondents.

we had about 45 other topics* we were planning to write about, but as we know how much our dear readers love their battered breakfast cakes, i had to report the latest on nyc's waffle scene.

swoon.

two waffle trucks and a waffle store and talk of waffle wars! we're hoping they aim a giant batter-filled cannon right at our apartment.

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while on the topic of food, i just came from a lunch seminar where they specified that you can bring a "brown bag lunch". they wrote this in the email that invited us all, and then when i responded to say i would be attending, one of the coordinators then responded to thank me and tell me to feel free to bring my "brown bag lunch" and eat it during the presentation. ok. why can't i just bring lunch? did it matter if we toted it in a recycled bag? what if i had carried in a tupperware? why the unnecessary use of all those adjectives?



*more like two, but we will get to them at some point this week.

ipod poetry. v.3

an ode to spring:

summer wind, sunday girl
sunny morning.

from the fast food files.

we are all over the news today of wendy's and arby's merging.

its slightly worrying, as we don't want wendy's to change its magical hangover-remover properties one bit.

but

roast beef AND a frosty?! yes, please.

our 15 minutes.

we don't know how many of you watch the smut that we do, but, Bear was on america's next top model this evening.

it was pretty wild.

musical vegetables, and the case of the disappearing salad dressing.

it always amazes me when i'm googling something and one of those little sidebar ads comes up from cafepress saying 'find _____ gifts here'. no matter how obscure an item i'm looking up, there somehow manages to be a tshirt for it. (that sometimes comes in handy*)

so today i was researching artichokes, and the ad came up about finding 100's of artichoke gifts. making my little disbelief noise, i decided to check out just how many artichoke t-shirts there could possibly be.

and the answer is, an awful lot.

and i kind of like some of them. although i'm slightly bitter about the name mozartichoke already being snatched up because how cute of a cartoon character would he have made?

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while we're on the topic of green healthy food items, missy and i have gone salad crazy in the hopes of lessening our chances of being accidentally harpooned on the beach this summer.

to make our healthy lunches all the more tasteful, we invested in the 'salad mist' variety of salad dressing. this morning, as missy misted her salad we joyfully discussed how there is only 1 calorie per spray, and how we could have 10 whole sprays for one serving. and how her salad glistened!

fast-forward a few hours, and her salad was bare. and i misted my own salad about 20 minutes ago and wound up with a scant taste of dressing. sigh. we should've known it was just too good to be true.



*how else would missy have gotten an "i heart seahorses" shirt for her birthday last year?

ipod poetry. v.2

for the detrimentally smitten:


i'm a slave for you.
i'm going down..
in my life.

xom

no more monkeying around...

we were dismayed to read this article today. besides our general feelings towards putting animals to sleep, we have a personal connection to these fuzzy little guys as we went and visited the monkey colony in gibraltar a few years ago, during a vacation in spain.

while they were certainly on the aggressive side, we wouldn't go so far as to call them 'molesters'. although, i guess we don't actually know what the apes were attempting when they started sticking their little paws in peoples' pockets...

for photographical evidence of loveandcyanide and the barbary apes:

see here.
(that is neither missy nor chrissy with the monkey.)

and here.
(but that arm belongs to us.)

and because hillary so nicely demanded it (and we since we want to show off our new found photo album-to-blog linking skillz!), here is a photo of bear from the same trip. this shot was taken pre-monkey adventure. and yes, he was listening to "in the navy".

holy teddy bears, batman!

even Bear*, whose cottony roots come from this establishment, does not understand this.



*i just realized that for the second time in a row, i copied a topic from the previous posting (SF, now Bear). things won't continue to be this mundane around here. we swear.

ipod poetry. v.1

and now for your end of the week treat, we introduce a new weekly feature: ipod poetry by missy.

i dedicate this first ipod poem to vous, bear.


in the flesh.

in the navy.

instant pleasure.


xom

a little love for the other coast.

San Francisco is officially our new favorite city (that none of us have ever been to). why, you ask?

because of THIS!

we had the honor of seeing that absolutely amazing theatrical spectacle back when it was in nyc...we're kinda thinking that gives us the right to have a day off on friday.

overheard in the office, huey lewis edition.

the manager in the office next door to mine was just on the phone, rattling off a list of cities for one of our authors to travel to. he ended off the list with:

seattle, san francisco too.

it took me about 2.2 seconds to realize this is part of a lyric from "the heart of rock & roll". i SO hope he did that intentionally...

although i do realize that not everyone has huey's repertoire memorized as well as missy and i do.

weekly roundup.

since we've been too lazy lately to actually write real posts about any of this, and its a rainy friday afternoon and we're certain you're feeling too lazy to read real posts about any of this...a short list of what happened to us this week.


- middle of the night charley horses. numerous ones. whilst whining this morning about my third night of interrupted sleep, missy reminded me that they can be caused by dehydration. and reminded me how much alcohol i drank this week. and i commented how our office water cooler is broken. right, problem solved! giant bottle of water is sitting next to me so i can actually sleep tonight.

- the song 'rubber duckie' was sporadically stuck in my head for two days straight.

- digital clocks are showing up everywhere. as i walked to work the other morning, i noticed a new one atop a store near my apartment. then gazing out my work window, a not-yet-functioning one is now randomly atop a residential building across the street.

- we got a step closer to proving our theory about the evil nature of dermatologists.

and finally, not one, but two people brought this* to my attention, saying they thought of me and had to send. while of course feeling honored, i am sort of questioning the bacon reputation i've made for myself.


*possibly NSFW. never thought i'd ever write that phrase on here...and, hmm, the fact that i'm posting late on a friday afternoon probably negates the usefulness of it.

clueless chrissy.

has some faction of pop culture that i don't pay attention to - i.e. american idol, SNL, perez hilton, youtube, anything played on the radio - brought back the exclamations "yowza" and "wowza"??

i've been noticing them creeping up into conversation and correspondence with friends/acquaintances/colleagues for the past few months, but recently i've been seeing the words SO often i've decided it just has to be some new trend that i'm not privy to.

so what am i missing? or is this just happening because i'm getting older, so yowza is a necessary language adjustment i have to get used to, like calling the guy next to me "sonny boy" and exclaiming "oh my heavens".

raining laughing cats and dogs.

i was grumpius maximus* for most of today...

but then i got into a hilarious email exchange with hillary, prompted by this.

and then i saw the headline of this article.





*not actually latin.

hoppy holidays peeple.

the breakfast cereal ones are my faves.

and as we're just now coming out of our peep-induced sugar coma...if you did celebrate easter yesterday, a happy belated one.

in what could be deemed as a slightly sadistic twist to the holiday, my grandmother opted to bring back an age-old family tradition and served rabbit - amongst a ton of other things - to celebrate. this caused major debate over dinner, and divided the family into the "i won't eat peter cottontail" - a phrase actually uttered during the course of the day - and the "screw the easter bunny! rabbit braised in red wine is just damn good" camps.

loveandcyanide was of course in the latter group, and we proved victorious. hoorah.

possibly the most math i've done in a decade.

at the deli across the street from my parents house - where i was this morning - they don't have an actual metrocard vending machine, so they have pre-packaged cards in denominations such as $10, $20, $50. normal, round numbers.

as i asked for a $10 card, the cashier laughed and said "oh, you mean the new $7 one?". i said sure, since i only needed $5 to get on the bus and into the city, and said bus was coming up the street and i didn't want to ask questions and miss it. but i thought a $7 card seemed ridiculous, especially being sold at this particular store in front of an express bus stop, since a buyer wouldn't even get a Staten Island round-trip out of it.

when i got on the bus and read the little package the card came in, things got even more ridiculous. the card came with a $1.05 bonus. what?! what genius came up with this? also noted on the package was this cheerful little notice:

after use, 5 cents will remain, which you can use when you refill your card.

really, mta?? how helpful! thank you!! so i actually have to fill the card forty times to get enough of these bonus nickels to equal one stinkin $2 subway ride.

some sisters just eat their frosted flakes. without inspection.

i don't know about you guys, but i've eaten at least 1000 cereal flakes that looked like this one.

little did missy and i know that we've been missing out on oodles of money-making opportunities!

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and while i'm on the subject of scamming, the riches starts its second season tomorrow night. its an awesome show, and we highly recommend tuning in if your Tuesday, 10pm EST time slot isn't already filled.

mollusks and me.

according to my sources, today is National Baked Scallops Day. happy happy! i hope everyone goes out and celebrates accordingly. the scallop is one of the items from the sea that i find most enjoyable (most likely because it doesn't look, taste, smell or act fishy). most especially when the little mollusk is wrapped in bacon...

and speaking of bacon, my favorite pig part was the theme of a most incredibly awesome and factual belated birthday present post from dear reader soulspeak23 - thank you again! - i was once part of a Staten-Island-Mall-bought best friend charm with her (it was one of those snazzy three-part ones, for all us BFF trios out there), and this was clearly a reason why. but enough of my nostalgia - just go over there and read it!

and speaking of birthday present postings, i did celebrate a birthday over the weekend - a kickoff to my late 20's, filled with flowers and fun and friends and a most awesome dinner. and then an awesome dinner party. and then an awesome family dinner. and then 3 more dinners to come between this week and next. whew! at the rate i'm being fed, i may not see my thirties.

its funny though, as i hadn't thought of 28 as a big deal age - then suddenly there are high school reunion talks and the realization that i'm reaching the "OMG, we've been friends for a decade. a whole decade!" point with a bunch of college friends - and i guess that 28 is some sort of milestone (even if its only really a milestone because its a milestone distance from the milestone of 18).

and then i read an article on christina ricci - an actress i never liked for the sheer fact that her name is rather similar to my own - and she brought up how she believes in 7-year cycles, and that everything in life changes in these 7-year phases, and as she just turned 28 too, she was looking forward to her new fourth cycle. i found this kind of interesting as i've been dealing with a number of big changes lately, so i'm just going to attribute them to the fact that my big shiny new fourth phase is starting as well.

i was now supposed to nicely tie this in to the life cycle of a scallop, but hell, they apparently can live until age 18, a number not easily divisible by 7. ah well.

ridiculously awesome.

after seeing this, i realize that my alarm clock is only the second coolest timepiece on earth.